


only half of something else

by haipollai



Category: Captain America (Comics)
Genre: First Kiss, M/M, Psychic Bond
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-22
Updated: 2014-03-22
Packaged: 2018-01-16 13:05:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,276
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1348525
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/haipollai/pseuds/haipollai
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's over in a blink and they're left to stare each other down. Sam gets a vague sense of 'uck before it's lost in a rush of everything else until Steve suddenly goes silent. Experienced at creating space while Sam is left feeling like he's floundering.</p>
            </blockquote>





	only half of something else

Everyone knows about soul bonds, even if science is still trying to explain why they happen. (Something about a part of the brain maybe triggering pheromones or syncing up via brainwaves, he doesn't try to understand.) Everyone knows it doesn't always mean anything. Bond pairs can be friends or lovers or siblings, mothers with infant children. It's not uncommon for coworkers in high stress jobs to bond, if only for a short time.

(There's nothing permanent about bonds either, everyone knows that too. Even if letting go of one can be really damn hard.)

Sam doesn't expect to bond with Steve Rogers. He's fairly sure Steve had once been bonded to Bucky, back in the war and even though it was decades ago, it's still something to deal with. Sam's seen a lot of people in and out of his office who lost a partner to war or drugs or just through sheer bad luck.

Lots of bad luck in his neighborhood.

But with Steve, it happens fast. Sam doesn't know what he expects, explaining a bond is like explaining something as basic as air. Nothing anyone said ever quite made sense. Until one day it's just there, like an itch in the back of his mind and he knows Steve's going to run left so Sam makes his play to the right.

It's over in a blink and they're left to stare each other down. Sam gets a vague sense of ' _uck_  before it's lost in a rush of everything else until Steve suddenly goes silent. Experienced at creating space while Sam is left feeling like he's floundering.

Sam bites his tongue until they're back at Steve's apartment, away from any witnesses, good guys or bad guys. 

"So-"

"I'm really sorry," Steve interrupts, dropping his shield with a heavy thunk on the hard wood. Sam stares at him dumbfounded, Steve's blocks are still rock solid, keeping him out. "I'm still a mess I'm sure and you shouldn't have to deal with that in your own head-"

"Wait. What?" He grabs a handful of Steve's uniform, forcing him to give Sam his attention. For a second Steve falters, and there's a flash of wall, _lust want_  before Steve's control snaps back in. It's like being pulled around by a rubber band. He's kept his own interest in Steve pushed down so he didn't fuck up their friendship, not wanting to ruin a stupid thing with a bad move but now- now he knows and for a second it's overwhelming. Sam has to take a deep breath to steady himself, to focus on figuring this shit out. "You're sorry?"

"Yea. I didn't-" He smiles shyly as if suddenly realizing where the confusion is. "It's not you Sam. Fuck, no. It's not you at all." There's a hesitation and then slowly he feels something like respect, and what he thinks might be friendship or might be something else.

"You're gonna have to teach me how to do that," he grumbles.

Steve's smile grows  "Yea I do. You're doing it kind of by accident right now though. Too much feeling turns into a wall."

"We were good today," Sam says softly, staring at where his hand still holds tightly onto Steve's shirt. "We're always good. But today? Fucking incredible."

"Yea," Steve breathes and Sam can feel the lust that hit him hard before slowly push through everything else Steve is letting him feel. "One of the best parts of it."

"You ok? With me and this- this thing?" He asks carefully, thinking of Bucky and Steve's history and he knows that Steve picks that up from him. Can see it in the sudden shadow across his face. Sam can't fault him for that, they both have bad memories.

"Of course. it's not- I knew when I woke up he was gone." He smiles tightly and leans into Sam, almost unconsciously. Seeking out comfort and Sam hopes he's projecting that well. "Told you my head was a mess."

"So's mine. And everyone else in the fucking world." He grins and drapes his free arm over Steve's shoulders.  _Comfort_. "You gonna tell me that your head was fucking perfect when you and Bucky worked together?"

He can feel Steve relax, and his own body echo that like a feedback wave. It reminds him of flying, feeling the different wind currents, figuring out how to use them to carry him where he needed to go. Cutting through the ones in his way.

"Sam."

"Stop being a fucking chicken and kiss me."

Steve's startled into a laugh but then his lips are on Sam's. Sam kisses back, careful at first, trying to pay attention to both Steve's lips and the mix of emotions he's feeling.  _Lovelustlovesafety_. There's no weird sense of feeling what Steve physically feels, he doesn't really want to know what it's like to kiss himself.

But the emotions along with the careful slide of lips against lips is a rush all of it's own.

He starts moving backwards, knowing there's a wall, or table top close by and they end up hitting the counter. It gives Steve leverage, something to hold Sam against and pull him closer and Sam wraps his own arms around Steve.

Steve pulls back first, breathing hard. Lips red and wet and Sam feels another rush of want that he knows is entirely his own. Steve's cheeks turn pink but he doesn't shy away or close himself off. "Pervert, you like being wanted." He nips sharply at Steve's lower lip.

"Who doesn't?" Steve angles his head for another kiss but this one only lasts a moment before he pulls back again. "This is ok, right? I'm not like-"

"You're not forcing me. And trust me man, this isn't your own feelings doing weird shit to my own."

Steve lets out a breath. "I've heard stories and i couldn't-" He gives Sam a crooked smile. "I'd feel like such an ass. I don't want to fuck this up. We've a good thing."

"And we're gonna have a great thing." He sounds more confident than he feels but Steve can see through all of it. It's not as terrifying as Sam thought it would be.

"That's a big promise," Steve teases. 

"You doubt me?" He holds his hand to his chest in mock hurt but it's hard to hold to it when Steve looks more relaxed than Sam thinks he's ever seen him. There's a lot they've held back from each other, old wounds that still hurt that no one dared talk about. It's all still there, but just slightly less daunting.

"Don't doubt you." Steve curls his fingers in Sam's shirt, gently tugging him away from the counter. Sam can feel his body heat even through his clothes. He wonders what he'll feel like pressed skin to skin. "Come on, let me help you with that control."

Sam lets himself be pulled along. "And where are we going for that?"

"Bed of course. Unless you want to stay out-"

"No. Bed sounds best for a lesson like that." He crowds into Steve's space just to see what he'll do. There's still a blush on his cheeks, but Steve smirks down at him and his arms move more firmly around Sam's torso.

"You're something pretty incredible," Steve murmurs, as if he almost doesn't realize he's saying it out loud.

"Fuck yea I am." Steve rolls his eyes but he lets Sam feel his amusement as well. "You're not too bad yourself," Sam says softer, more sincere. He never expected to end up with Steve Rogers in his head, but it's not feeling like too bad of a situation.


End file.
